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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26891794">July 4th, 1971</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sunlolli/pseuds/Sunlolli'>Sunlolli</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Hetalia: Axis Powers</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Abandonment, Angst, F/M, Gen, Gilbert Ludwig and Romano is only briefly mentioned, M/M, Maybe except for Francis, Mentions of Alzheimer's desease, Mentions of Arthur's brothers, More tags to be added, Most of them are punk, Negligent parenthood, Punk England (Hetalia), Punk Spain (hetalia), REALLY bad parenting, Slice of Life, The negligence is very much not intended on Arthur's side</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-10-08</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-01-04</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 01:35:29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Major Character Death</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>9</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>6,749</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26891794</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sunlolli/pseuds/Sunlolli</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Fatherhood is as unexpected as it is exciting - You give everything to that kid and you do your best to raise them right.<br/>Just sometimes, they don't see it that way.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>America &amp; England (Hetalia), England/France (Hetalia), England/Mother oc, France/England (Hetalia), Only mentioned once - Relationship</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>63</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Tape 01</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>[[Tape 01. Label: July 4th 1971 - Hiya Alfred]]</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>[Arthur] Bloody- Oh, it <strong><em>does</em></strong> work, took long enough- Ahem</p><p> </p><p>[Arthur] Hi! Uh, I have absolutely no idea how to begin with this, it's not exactly like I planned this out beforehand or anything, hahaha</p><p> </p><p>[Arthur] But anyway, I guess I could start by... Well... Telling you... -cripes this is so awkward-- Sorry; Let me start over.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>(Arthur re-settles himself. He takes a breath in, and composes his expression to a more serious one. It looks strange on his face; An alien picture in the midst of spiky, dirty blonde hair that makes him look like an odd species of hedgehog. Nothing is strange about a hedgehog-looking person being serious, but his demeanor doesn’t seem much for business. In fact, he seems like much the opposite.) </em>
</p><p> </p><p>[Arthur] Well, first of all, you are asleep just next door, so if the audio is quiet that's why-- You were especially rowdy about sleeping tonight, so I really don't want to have to spend another hour getting you to calm down again, but; Whatever, all you need to do is turn up the volume. Though I suppose if you ever watch this, you probably already know that, don't you? Assuming you ever will, of course, I'm not even sure how I'm going to go about handing this over to you- It's bloody embarassing as it is sitting here talking to myself...</p><p> </p><p>[Arthur] ...</p><p> </p><p>[Arthur] Listen, Alfred, I have an odd feeling about you- Have had for awhile, and-- Oh shoot, hold on.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>(There's a quiet fussing in the background and Arthur stands from his seated position on the floor to disappear through a doorway in the other end of what seems to be a meesy living room. A single lamp stands in the corner, the bulb is bright. There's no lamp shade.) ... (Arthur returns, dragging his feet back to where he sat on the floor before. His shirt bags on him - But that's a fashion choice of his own. He hardly looks like the person to care.)</em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>(He sighs as he retakes the position in front of the camera)</em>
</p><p> </p><p>[Arthur] False alarm, just... Dreaming. <em>(Arthur rubs his face with both his hands. He looks tired; Sitting in the middle of the living room floor like that.)</em></p><p> </p><p>[Arthur] You've been having a lot of dreams lately, it's incredible how lively your imagination already seems to be- For better or for worse, though, I can't quite tell.</p><p>
  <em>(There's a pause, Arthur staring somewhere beyond the camera.)</em>
</p><p> </p><p>[Arthur] As I was saying, I have an odd feeling about you. Not, <strong>bad</strong>, I think... but I just feel like something is going to... Happen. That I can't <em>control</em>, or can't...<em> Fix</em>.</p><p> </p><p>[Arthur] It’s as if, you’re going to grow up and something is going to go <em>wrong</em> somewhere along the way - Like, in a way that I can’t control or don’t realize will happen. It’s as if… It feels as if you’re going to slip through my fingers somehow, different from the way I hear others talking about their brats “growing up too fast” and all that nonsense, but with this it…</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>(Arthur pauses again, this time to shift his focus to the camera. His eyebrows furrows together in frustration, and he places his folded hands in front of his mouth. When he speaks, it sounds muffled.) </em>
</p><p> </p><p>[Arthur] I’m not sure… It feels as if I need to apologize beforehand, that it’s going to be something I can’t fix and-- <em>God,</em> I hate that sort of thing!</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>(He ruffles his hair as if to drive the point home) </em>
</p><p> </p><p>[Arthur] Things being out of my hands, things I can’t <em>fix</em>, I hate it, it’s so frustrating and unnerving.</p><p> </p><p>[Arthur] I want to be able to look at you when you wake up in the morning, and tell you that "everything is going to be good and dandy today and the days forward!” but saying that could just as well be a big, fat lie couldn’t it? And I don’t want to do that to you, love. I don’t want to promise you something like that and then not come through on it, you understand? It’s not that I don’t want to, by god I <em>do</em>, but I <strong>shouldn’t</strong> and that’s the whole problem here, innit?</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>(He looks into the camera now, his hair even messier than it had been before, falling into his ashen face. He must’ve been awake for a while.) </em>
</p><p> </p><p>[Arthur] Kids remember things like those, Alfred, and if I tell you now, that I'm going to be your handy <em>life-engineer</em> your entire life and tell you that I promise to come to your aid and fix everything that goes wrong, that could be a lie, and I don't want you to grow up thinking I let you down, because I didn't! I would <em>never</em> do that.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>(He takes a breath and raises a hand to his neck.)</em>
</p><p> </p><p><em><span class="u">[</span></em>Arthur]  Y'know, when your mum dropped you off out of nowhere last year; I swore to myself that that day was probably the worst day of my life. Like, completely destroy my entire future, dreams and all, and I <em>begged</em> her for <em>days</em> to just- Take you back, or give you away, but when she finally caved and stood at my front door with .. Hell, I suppose she’d be your <em>granny</em>, that old witch- With your granny beside her, ready to take you off my hands.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>(Arthur laughs, quietly, his entire body shakes with it.)</em>
</p><p> </p><p>[Arthur] I couldn't bloody hand you over! It's incredible how charismatic babies can be. One look; You sent me one look, and it was as if we’d had a whole conversation, and never in my 19 years of life have I ever felt like a bigger tosser than I did then. And in truth, I am the worlds biggest tosser, I really am. What kind of arsehole takes in a kid and thinks he can rule the world with it? Only me, I assure you.</p><p>
  <em>(Absentmindely, Arthur rubs underneath his eyes. Not because he's crying. Because he isn't.)</em>
</p><p> </p><p>[Arthur] But, so then, that was it; I just legged it out of there. Just, left my door wide open for anyone to wander in, left your mum and your granny to stand back and just watch me run down the street with a bundle of pure joy in my arms, and it really felt like you were cheering me on in that moment; That your silly baby gurgling was really you saying;</p><p>“Go, Arthur Kirkland, go!” And it was blinding! Absolutely blinding. I don't think anything in the world could ever compare to that moment.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>(He's smiling with the remnants of the previous laugh he erupted into, soft sparks flying in his eyes. They look slightly damp. He's not crying though. Definitely not crying.)</em>
</p><p> </p><p>[Arthur] Where was I going with this, I had a point...</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>(Arthur's voice cracks humorously in the middle of the sentence, a dumb smile still present on his face.)</em>
</p><p> </p><p>[Arthur] Well, no matter... Just... Whatever might happen in the future, whether it's something I do, or say or... Or don't do? Whatever it is, just please, Alfred, don't... Don't hate me too much, alright? That's... vague, sorry</p><p> </p><p>[Arthur] I mean that I’m going to do my <em>fucking</em> best to make sure you're comfortable. Always have food on the table and a roof over your head, and I'll even work that tad bit harder to make sure you get to enjoy yourself a steaming hot chocolate once in awhile, as well. I'll do everything in my power to make that happen, so you don’t need to worry about moving constantly or worrying about when you’re going to eat next, alright? And all I ask, I just need you to not hate me- Please, just don’t hate me, I’ll do everything in my power, I’ll do my best, so... Please...</p><p> </p><p>[Arthur] I'm sorry. I'm really sorry, if I ever do something, Alfred, I love you so much, and I know that... I know that I’m just some young bloke living in some rundown apartment, I have no idea what I’m doing, but just know that I am truly truly sorry. If I could, I'd just, come through the screen right this second and beat myself to a bloody pulp, but seeing as time travel isn't exactly in yet, I'll have to make due with giving him a proper ear-full through a video tape.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>(Arthur's smile wobbles, his hands fiddling with something unseen and he lowers his head quietly. Maybe a bit Shamefully, too.)</em>
</p><p> </p><p>[Arthur] Uhm... That's all I have to say. You're still asleep, thank god, and as soon as this ends, I'm going to dedicate everything I have and do, to you, Alfred, so wherever and... <em>Whenever</em> you are. I love you, Wookums, stay safe out there, the world’s a living hell, doubt that ever changes...</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>(Yeah...)</em>
</p><p> </p><p>That’s all.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>(The tape ends on Arthur’s face close to the camera, he’s reached behind it to turn it off, and he’s awkwardly winking at the lens. Awkward, but so much more radiant and determined than what he’s been for… A while. It’s an odd look on him.)</em>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>[[End tape 01]]</p><p><br/>
<br/>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Tape 02</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>[[Tape 02. Label: July 4th 1972 - Uncle Antonio and Uncle Gilbert at your service!]]</span>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>(The video tape starts with the entire screen filled with a face. It’s tan, and green eyes are peering directly into it, before it’s moved further away, and a curly haired man is smiling- </span>
  </em>
  <b>
    <em>Grinning</em>
  </b>
  <em>
    <span> into the camera) </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>[Antonio] Happy birthday, Sobrino!</span>
</p><p>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <em>
    <span>(There’s a faint laugh, followed by an odd accent</span>
  </em>
  <span>)</span>
</p><p>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>[Gilbert] His name is Alfred, Antonio!</span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>[Antonio] Sobrino means Nephew! It’s not a name!</span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>[Gilbert] Ah-</span>
</p><p>
  <span>[Arthur] Oi, don’t touch that! It wasn’t exactly </span>
  <b>
    <em>cheap</em>
  </b>
  <span>! HEY--</span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>[Antonio] Oh, relax would you, we’re not going to drop it! Besides, these are his formative years, right? Wanna get as much as possible for the memories.</span>
  <span>
    <br/>
    <br/>
  </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>(The camera is wobbly, obviously held by someone trying to evade someone else. Namely, Arthur. It flips around to show the living room again. It’s more cleaned up, though still with boxes and clothes scattered everywhere. The lamp has a lamp shade now and there is a sofa and tv set up in one corner. The camera catches the glimt of a small figure on the floor, before a new face; A pale face; Fills the screen and directs the camera back towards Arthur and the green eyed curly haired man, who’s now been introduced as Antonio. </span>
  </em>
  <b>
    <em>Uncle Antonio</em>
  </b>
  <b>.</b>
  <em>
    <span>)</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Gilbert] Smile for the camera! Doubt Alfred will appreciate more fighting than he already has to deal with!</span>
</p><p>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <em>
    <span>(There’s an odd laugh, from the pale man with a german lilt. He pronounces Alfred’s name oddly.)</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>[Antonio] Aye, I doubt Alfred will mind it, he’s probably kind of used to it by now!</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Gilbert] That’s what I meant!</span>
</p><p>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <em>
    <span>(The camera shifts downward, and shows Alfred sitting on the floor. He’s wearing an old, slightly torn band shirt and biting on a cola bottle. He seems immensely focused on Arthur and Antonio, until Gilbert squats down to sit beside him.)</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Gilbert] Hey there, squirt, y’having a good time?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <em>
    <span>(There’s a pause of Alfred just staring, still gnawing on the bottle, before he erupts into a grin. It lights up his entire face, and when he drops the bottle to reach toward the camera, it wobbles to the side and ends on the floor, showing part of The Pale Man, Gilbert, picking him up with glee.)</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Gilbert] Aaah, you’re such a cute little bird! Your eyes are the same as Luddy’s back at home!</span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>[Arthur] Be careful lifting him like that, he’s not a dog--</span>
</p><p>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <em>
    <span>(Arthur briefly steps into frame and picks Alfred from Gilbert’s hands. The camera lifts from the ground, as Antonio, presumably, picks it back up from the floor and aims it at Arthur. He’s reaching a free hand down to help Gilbert stand. It looks oddly domestic, in a really weird and awkward type of way.)</span>
  </em>
  <span>
    <br/>
    <br/>
  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Arthur] Ludwig is much more behaved than Al is. He won’t sit still no matter what I do!</span>
</p><p>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <em>
    <span>(Arthur bends down to pick up the cola bottle for Alfred. Gilbert stands slightly off to the side, his arms crossed over an MC5 shirt. It looks torn in the neck, but it seems to be on purpose. His hair sits on top of his head messily. As if he cut it with a blindfold and left it to grow out for a few months without shame.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Looking at him, it’s most likely the case.)</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>[Gilbert] Ludwig is a special case, so I don’t really blame you. I mean, not a lot of kids are that meek and serious at age--</span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>[Antonio] Maybe it’s from when your mom left? That was kind of harsh, wasn’t it?- Just because he’s little doesn’t mean he doesn’t notice changes like that, kids are weirdly perceptive.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>(Gilbert goes quiet. Arthur seems to cast his gaze to the ground and the camera drops as well. The floor is wooden, there. An unkept shade that looks like it could use more than a little aftercare. It has chafs and splinters, and a pair of shoes stand wornly in frame. Someone scoffs quietly, barely audible. Antonio shifts his weight from one leg to the other. The floor creaks under him.)</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <span>[Antonio] I don’t--</span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>[Gilbert] Really got some nerve, what the hell does that have to do with anything, that was completely just out of nowhere!</span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>[Antonio] I mean, am I wrong? It’s not that big of a deal, I mean, most of our parents just went and left anyway. We’re here for Alfred’s birthday, right, I mean, his mom literally just dropped him off at Kirkland’s, it’s--</span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>[Arthur] Don’t drag us into this, this has nothing to do with us.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <em>
    <span>(There’s a fussing sound and the camera tilts back towards Arthur, When it focuses, Alfred starts crying, and the cola bottle clatters emptily to the floor.)</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>[Antonio] Aah- Sorry, sorry!</span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>[Arthur] Why do you two have to always be so </span>
  <b>
    <em>bloody</em>
  </b>
  <span> loud?!</span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>[Antonio] You’re literally shouting right now! Look at him, he’s crying harder!</span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>[Gilbert] Have either of you maybe considered it’s the </span>
  <b>
    <em>tone</em>
  </b>
  <span> of voice and not--</span>
</p><p>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <em>
    <span>(The camera turns off abruptly, ending the argument and Alfred’s crying in a sudden black screen.)</span>
  </em>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>[[End tape 02]]</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Tape 03</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>[[Tape 03. Label: July 4th 1975 - Fischig Geheimnis]]</span>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>(The video begins with Alfred. He’s standing in front of a glass wall. It’s blue, and his hands are planted against the glass pane, as a school of indistinguishable fish glides by, sparkling and glistening in the luminescent lights, from inside the tank. He watches them with awe, trying to press his face closer to the window to follow where they went. Where they go. Until he decides he can’t see them anymore. When he leans away, mouth slightly agape, and one precious gumdrop falls from his mouth and onto the floor, a small clatter that seems to echo around the aquarium. He looks at it, as if to see if it had actually fallen, before bending down to pick it back up.)</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <span>[Gilbert] Oh-Hey, Oh wow wow wow, no give it here, give it- Thank you</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <em>
    <span>(A hand reaches into frame towards Alfred, who, wide eyed, hands the gumdrop to Gilbert. When he withdraws his hand, he’s holding it as if it’d done something bad, that he couldn’t control.)</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>
    <br/>
    <br/>
  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>[Gilbert] Damn kid, no need to look so scared, it’s just candy. I’ll get you another one!</span>
</p><p>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <em>
    <span>(Gilbert seems to fumble around for a moment, Alfred staring in something akin to guilt. Gilbert, as blunt as he is, tosses the gumdrop back on the floor, completely apathetic towards whoever steps on it by accident later. Actually, maybe not oblivious, maybe that’s exactly what he intended.)</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <span>[Alfred] I-- I’m sorry I dropped it</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Gilbert] Huh? What are you sorry for? You’re not the only one who spits out their candy in awe at all these awesome, sparkly water-guys. Look at that one, it’s huge!</span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>[Alfred] But! But dad says that-- Dad says it’s bad!</span>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>(Alfred wrings his hands anxiously, looking between Gilbert and the camera. The fish are suddenly the least important thing in the world, and Gilbert seems to pause for a moment. When he speaks again, it’s quieter, more reassuring. The camera tilts to the ground, and a pair of dress shoes replaces Alfred’s downcast glance.)</span>
  </em>
  <span>
    <br/>
    <br/>
  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>[Gilbert] Well, do I look like ‘dad’, to you, huh? Do you see any thick censor bars on my forehead? Or an ugly mug that’s always scowling?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <em>
    <span>(Alfred responds in the negative, a small lilt to his voice, that sounds hesitant but bright. Gilbert chuckles, before the camera is moving again, turning and suddenly facing himself. The angle is short and awkwardly crooked. Alfred must be the one holding it.)</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>[Alfred] No…</span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>[Gilbert] And do I sound like him?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>(Alfred laughs, Gilbert’s accent taking on a mocking-interpretation of Arthur that manages to hit spot on in just the right places, almost replacing the german-sounding ‘r’s that Alfred has come to identify Gilbert with. The camera directs itself better to get Gilbert’s face on tape, and Gilbert looks like he’s enjoying the attention.)</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>[Alfred]... A little bit.</span>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>(Gilbert looks offended, and reaches behind the camera to ruffle Alfred’s hair, the kid chuckling away at the loose swear words that fall from the german.)</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>[Gilbert] I’m going to pretend I didn’t just hear you say that- Point is, that one single gumdrop is literally like, 2 cents, I’ll just get you another one and everything will be all good and awesome again, no need to cry about it!</span>
</p><p>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <em>
    <span>(The camera stills slightly. An odd thing for a toddler to freeze like that, but Gilbert doesn’t seem to notice before reaching over and taking the camera. When Alfred is back in frame, his shoulders are lax and he’s nodding his head. He looks determined in a toddler-sort of way, and when Gilbert simply ruffles his hair, a smile breaks out on his little face, dimples accentuating the liveliness of it. Gilbert cheers at the sight.)</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <span>[Gilbert] There it is, that baby-grin! Don’t take Arthur that seriously, birdie, he’s just mad he can’t taste the candy anymore from all the whiskey! But you can! And you should! If you ever need anything, you can always come to uncle Gilbert here, and I’ll give you all the candy you want! I’m sure Ludwig wouldn’t mind playing with you again, either!</span>
</p><p>
  <span>[Alfred] What’s a whiskey?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>(There’s a pause, Alfred looking curiously up at Gilbert with his hands back at his sides. Gilbert hums.)</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Gilbert] I… Guess it’s like Adult orange juice..?</span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>(A serious expression comically replaces the curiosity, and Alfred looks deep in thought. Or, as deep in thought as a 5 year old can be)</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Alfred] Oh, well, orange juice is tasty, so I can understand why dad likes it</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>(Another pause, this time oddly more morose than the other, and Gilbert stands up.)</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>[Gilbert] Yeah... Makes sense, doesn’t it?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>[Gilbert] Anyway birthday spawn, smile for the camera and then let’s get you a BIIIIIIG bag of gumdrops.</span>
  <span>
    <br/>
    <br/>
  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <em>
    <span>(The tape ends, the grinning face of Alfred filling the screen.)</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <span>[[End tape 03.]]</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Hhhh sorry for the long wait, I wasn't happy with how it was, so I didn't want to post it- But I've edited it now and I can confidentally say that I'm kind of proud with how this came out. Hope you enjoyed!!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Tape 04</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>[[Tape 04. Label: Blank, 1977]]</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>(There’s a moment of darkness and shuffling. Someone must have their hand over the lens, how clumsy.)</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>[Arthur] Sure, but what does that have to do with anything?</span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>[Antonio] Oh, I don’t know, maybe that you have a kid to look after? Did you think about that?</span>
  <span>
    <br/>
    <br/>
  </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>(There’s silence, a quiet sigh of a fan being the only audible thing. The lens continues being covered, only small cracks of light manage to peak in where the hand shifts slightly.)</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Antonio] You’re a damn coward, you know.</span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>[Arthur] </span>
  <em>
    <span>Excuse</span>
  </em>
  <span> me?</span>
</p><p> </p><p><span>[Antonio] Running away won’t solve anything, and you </span><em><span>know</span></em><span> it won’t, yet here you are-</span><span><br/></span><span><br/></span><em><span>(More shuffling. Squeaking of shifting leather, and footsteps. Approaching. The camera continues to be covered.)</span></em><span><br/></span><span><br/></span><span>[Arthur] You have absolutely no right to butt in like you are, you have nothing to do with </span><em><span>my</span></em><span> life and you sure as hell has nothing to do with </span><em><span>his.</span></em> <em><span>All</span></em><span> you are, Fernandez, is daft idiot. Nothing but a damn </span><em><span>nuisance.</span></em></p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Antonio] And yet, somehow, I still have more sense in me than you do, despite being a ‘idiot’.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Antonio] Face it, you can’t take care of him! You can’t even take care of </span>
  <em>
    <span>yourself</span>
  </em>
  <span>, how the hell do you expect to bring him all the way to </span>
  <em>
    <span>france</span>
  </em>
  <span>?!</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>(The hand comes away and brightness bleeds away for a floor, carpeted. Two sets of feet, both with shoes and both rough-looking. Arthur, matte dress-shoes with half-tied laces, shifts his feet. When he speaks, it’s small, threatening.)</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Arthur] Turn that thing off.</span>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <span>[[End tape 04.]]</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Tape 05</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>[[Tape 05. Label: July 4th, 1983 - Asshole]]</span>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>(Alfred sits awkwardly perched on a chair. He’s wearing loose jeans and a t-shirt, he looks uncomfortable, but he rubs the back of his neck, red spots riddling his face underneath a pair of aviator glasses. No, not aviator sun-glasses, normal glasses. When he speaks, his voice cracks, and he clears his throat.)</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <span>[Alfred] Uh, I didn’t really know if I should make this, since, y’know, what if you don’t see it, y’know? That’d be mad annoying, since this took a lot of effort- So you better watch it!</span>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>(He shifts and the chair creaks. There’s a dull whisper from behind the camera, and Alfred nods, holding up two fingers before directing his attention back to the camera.)</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>[Alfred] Sorry, cake’s ready, so I can’t talk forever. Not like I wanted to or anything, this is totally just because Maria told me to, not because I miss you or anything.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>[Alfred] Ahem- Well, uh, happy birthday to me, I guess… That’s… Really uncool to say, I can’t believe I just said that, totally lame…</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Alfred] Anyway, hope you’re okay wherever you are. Gilbert still won’t tell me, but he totally knows, like, I know he calls you sometimes and that he gets really mad- But I don’t really get why, I mean… Okay, maybe I get it a little bit, it’s totally uncool of you to not tell me where you went and all, I mean… </span>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>(Alfred looks at the camera, eyes fixating on the lens and fiddling with his hands. He looks thoughtful, and maybe a bit caught off guard. By himself, maybe? He looks down at his hands.)</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Alfred] Yeah… Yeah, that was actually really uncool… Of you… </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>(When Alfred looks back up, he looks slightly angry, maybe a bit sad, but definitely more angry. He stands from his seat, arms hanging by his sides. He’s grown tall.)</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Alfred] This is stupid- MARIA, CAN I TURN IT OFF NOW?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <em>
    <span>(A female voice calls from behind the camera, and Alfred strides to the camera. His footfalls are heavy, purposeful, and as he nears the camera, a quiet curse is audible under his breath, before the tape ends with a click.)</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[[Tape 05. Ends]]</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Hey y'all!! Just want to say that I do read comments and they make me SOSOSO HAPPY everytime I see them, I'm just really bad at remembering to respond to them, and when I do I'm always at a loss for what to say. But know that every little comment and kudos makes me really really happy!! &lt;3</p><p>Also a quick note about this story: I'm trying as best as I can to explain the situation from both Arthur's perspective as a parent and Alfred's perspective as a child -Since there's always a story untold from both sides! Anyway, enjoy!! xx</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Tape 06</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>[[Tape 06. Label: 5th July 1983 - I’m back!]]</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> (At first, the tape looks to be frozen, a few stripes rolling across the screen and a distorted sound screeching through the speakers almost making the tape unwatchable. But if you ignore the sound, or turn the volume down and fast forward, you’ll see an odd POV. It will be of a house, familiar, because it’s Arthur and Alfred’s little flat in London.  </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Alfred will be walking towards the front door, glancing oddly at the person holding the camera. He wears a cowboy hat, hair looking ruffled underneath. The Camera moves closer as Alfred pulls the front door open, and if you stop the tape, and start it normally, the sound will be ordinary, and the tape will work normally in the middle of a sentence.) </em>
</p><p> </p><p>[Maria] --te, but happy birthday, Alfred!</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> (Alfred stares ahead, as the camera draws closer, Maria’s voice cheerful but unbefitting to Alfred’s expression. It looks… Conflicted. And he backs away slightly, a smile, unsure, starts forming on his face.) </em>
</p><p> </p><p>[Alfred] Arthur?</p><p> </p><p>[Arthur] What’s with that, since when did i lose the title as Dad, ay?</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> (He’s chuckling, half-heartedly, but Alfred’s smile falters just slightly, as he stands before his dad. He’s taller than him now, having to look oddly downward to meet Arthur’s gaze. Arthur, on the other hand, looks surprised, whistling as he pats Alfred on the arms, looking him up and down.) </em>
</p><p> </p><p>[Arthur] You’ve gotten so big!</p><p> </p><p>[Alfred] Well, yeah, obviously!</p><p> </p><p>[Arthur] Well, it’s good to see you’ve eaten, then I don’t need to feed you enough for 7 years, now do I?</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> (All goes still, and Alfred rubs the back of his neck. He forces a laugh.) </em>
</p><p> </p><p>[Alfred] Sure don’t, dad…</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> (Another silence, tense and awkward, and Maria decides to step in, camera going to Alfred as she asks to help Arthur getting his things back into the apartment. Arthur shakes his head and politely declines. He has more to say.) </em>
</p><p> </p><p>[Arthur] Uh, say, Alfred, since I’ve been away for awhile, I thought it could be… easier, if you tried living with more people than just me?</p><p> </p><p>[Alfred] What… Does that mean?</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> (Arthur crosses his arms, a trenchcoat, looking so foreign on him, shifts with the movement.) </em>
</p><p> </p><p>[Arthur] Well, I’ve found… A frog, that I quite think I like, and… He’s waiting in the car downstairs with Matthew…</p><p> </p><p>...</p><p> </p><p>[Alfred] … Am… I supposed to <em> know </em> who Matthew <em> is </em> ?? </p><p> </p><p>
  <em> (Arthur shifts his weight to his other foot, Maria, temporary caretaker now off-duty, makes to leave. Arthur sighs, dejected, as he moves a hand to cover his eyes.) </em>
</p><p> </p><p>[Arthur] No, I suppose you’re not... </p><p> </p><p>[Alfred] Soooooo?</p><p> </p><p>[Arthur] Matthew is his son… He’s going to be living here as well, he’s around the same age as you are… </p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <em> (Arthur keeps his face covered, and Alfred doesn’t say anything. He just stands there, the camera moving quietly with his breathing. Maria presses past them, moving behind Arthur to the hallway and glancing back apologetically as she motions a hand to her ear, telling Alfred she’ll be in touch. As she hurries down the stairs, her steps echoing in the corridor, Alfred seems to take a deep breath, and Arthur slides his hand down his face and looks up at him. He looks tired. But that’s nothing new. He’s always looked tired, if Alfred’s recollection hasn’t failed him. And of course, it hasn’t.) </em>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>[Alfred] Sure.</p><p> </p><p>[Arthur] … What?</p><p> </p><p>[Alfred] Sure. Whatever. I’ll make room for a bed in my room, it’s… No problem.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> (Arthur doesn’t look convinced. But that’s not Alfred’s problem.) </em>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>[[End tape 06.]]</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Kind of... Running cold, but I'll try and get the next filler-chapters fully developed, since the original drabble I made didn't explain things well enough for me to just post *that*, so I, of course, decided to write extra chapters, which is dragging out things significantly, but I'm really glad you're enjoying it so far!! I try to make it as immersive as possible! xx</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Tape 07</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>[[Tape 07. Label: July 1st, 1984 - Dudebro Matt-eh!!]]</span>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>(The screen opens on a rooftop, a pair of shoes knocking against a pair of sneakers, sitting idly right beside. The sun is high on the sky, and there’s a slight wind whooshing past.)</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Alfred] So, what do you usually do on your birthday? Do you like, get croissants, behead the rich and sing the french national anthem or--</span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <em>
    <span>(There’s a shove, followed by Alfred’s laughing)</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Matthew] Oh shut it, would you, I’m canadian not French. And </span>
  <em>
    <span>no</span>
  </em>
  <span>, I get a cake with candles like everybody else, but if Papa starts to sing I make sure I’m far gone before he can get to the second verse.</span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>[Alfred] Oh my god, that’s so lame! You have to sit through it like a </span>
  <em>
    <span>man</span>
  </em>
  <span>, bro! I can’t believe you’d run away and show them your </span>
  <em>
    <span>weakness</span>
  </em>
  <span>!! They’ll </span>
  <em>
    <span>know</span>
  </em>
  <span> you think it’s awkward, and then you’ll </span>
  <em>
    <span>never be free!!</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Matthew] Say whatever you want, I am </span>
  <em>
    <span>not</span>
  </em>
  <span> going to sit through a terrible rendition of “happy birthday” because Papa doesn’t like the original lyrics.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Alfred] WHAT?! Oh my god, you </span>
  <em>
    <span>HAVE</span>
  </em>
  <span> to tell me the </span>
  <em>
    <span>best</span>
  </em>
  <span> happy birthday song he’s ever written you! </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>(The camera moves swiftly to face Matthew. He looks embarrassed, a hand coming to cover his face as he looks away. Behind him, the horizon is bright and clear. Matthew near glows in the sun, sitting on the roof with a pair of old shorts and a t-shirt. It billows slightly in the wind, and Alfred’s hand comes into frame, grabbing hold of Matthew’s shoulder. He shakes him, and Matthew shakes his head)</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Matthew] Why do you have to record everything! Record yourself or something, I don’t want to be on there!</span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>[Alfred] Haha! No way, you gotta get used to it! One day I’ll make it to Hollywood and I’ll be making the </span>
  <em>
    <span>BEST MOVIES OF ALL TIME</span>
  </em>
  <span> and I want </span>
  <em>
    <span>you</span>
  </em>
  <span> to star in them!! We’ll be The Unstoppable Brother Duo- Making the movie-business a better place one movie at a time! </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>(Matthew uncovers his face and rolls his eyes, looking exasperatedly up at the sky, before turning to Alfred. Alfred continues to laugh.)</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Matthew] Come on, you really believe that? Give it here--</span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>[Alfred] What, no! Get your own, dude! Hey, stop that, </span>
  <em>
    <span>DUDE!-</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Matthew] You can’t be a good-- A good-- Stop resisting, I know your weaknesses-- Give--!! It!!! Ahah!</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>(Alfred appears on the camera after a clear struggle, the image slightly blurry until he sits up, hair tousled and glasses askew. He looks into the camera grumpily, before directing a glare toward Matthew.)</span>
  </em>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>[Matthew] There, how do </span>
  <em>
    <span>you</span>
  </em>
  <span> like it, eh? How can you be a director, if you don’t know how to be in front of the camera </span>
  <em>
    <span>yourself</span>
  </em>
  <span>?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Alfred] If you break that, say goodbye to your precious Cd player!</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>(There’s a gasp, Matthew’s voice dropping an octave)</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Matthew] You </span>
  <em>
    <span>wouldn’t</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>(Alfred smirks, eyes squinting daringly and placing his hands confidently on his sides. His legs crossed under him.)</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Alfred] Try me.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>(There’s a pause, Alfred sitting patiently in frame. His hair moving in the wind. It’s grown slightly, since last year, framing his face nicely, and falling in the right places. He wears an old shirt, a worn band name on the front; It seems to be falling apart at the seams, but Alfred wears it with a weird sense of comfort - Most likely a sentimental piece. Matthew gives, and dejectedly hands the camera back to Alfred, who takes it with a menacing chuckle.)</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Alfred] Smart choice, guess that cd player survives another winter</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>(Matthew, back in frame, frowns at him, but doesn’t say anything, simply settling for pulling his legs up.)</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Alfred] … Hey, you never answered me! The best lyric-drop by Francis! I </span>
  <em>
    <span>have</span>
  </em>
  <span> to know!</span>
</p><p>
  <span>[Matthew] If you turn that off, I’ll tell you.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Alfred] Aaaw, what? That’s so uncool, man, I wanna get your entire b-day on tape!</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Matthew] Does it even have that much film?</span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>[Alfred] … That’s not the point!</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Matthew] Well, if you want to know, you turn it off.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Alfred] UGH- </span>
  <em>
    <span>FINE!</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <span>[[End tape 07]]</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I really want to try changing up how the formatting looks, the writing style is still going to be the same, but I'm thinking about making it more manuscript-ish, but I'll think about it for a bit, hmm</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0008"><h2>8. Tape 08</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>[[Tape 08. Label: July 4th 1984 - From “Matt-eh bro” to “America-man”]]</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>(When the tape starts up, it’s to Matthew’s face, a sudden burst of light illuminating his face and reflecting off of his glasses before disappearing nearly as fast as it’d appeared. He doesn’t seem to really know what he’s doing, but he’s outside, hair pulled back and away from his face. Someone whoops in the background, and the faintest tint of a smile grows on Matthew’s face, as another burst of light brightens up his face, a bright red, followed by a shattering crack of sound. When he speaks, it’s quiet, aimed at the camera as a loud, booming laughter echoes a few feet away from him.)</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Matthew] Alright, so, I know you told me to film the fireworks, and I did in the beginning </span>
  <em>
    <span>no I didn’t</span>
  </em>
  <span>, but there’s literally no other times you let me get anywhere </span>
  <em>
    <span>near</span>
  </em>
  <span> this thing, so I had to take my chance--</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Alfred] </span>
  <em>
    <span>ARE YOU GETTING THIS, MATTIE?!</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Matthew] uh- YEAH, KEEP GOING!</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Alfred] </span>
  <span>HAHAHA, COOL, AWESOME!</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Matthew] Anyway, uhm</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Matthew] You didn’t record today, and I honestly started wondering whether maybe you’d gotten sick of it or something, or, even worse, it </span>
  <em>
    <span>broke</span>
  </em>
  <span>, but</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Matthew] You just kind of avoided Arthur? I think? Not like you </span>
  <em>
    <span>usually</span>
  </em>
  <span> are around him a lot, but I think I saw you two talking, at most, a couple of times, and you not recording on your </span>
  <em>
    <span>birthday</span>
  </em>
  <span>, is just really weird, so I felt like I had to make </span>
  <em>
    <span>something</span>
  </em>
  <span> at least for you.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Matthew] I’m really bad at words, but I just want you to know that you’re really obnoxious</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>(Matthew chuckles lowly, the fireworks firering off continuously in the background. He decides to turn the camera around finally, lens capturing blurry bursts of color on a dark sky. Not as black as winter, but dark enough for the light to carry bright across the whole neighborhood. Matthew continues, the silhouette of Alfred lighting another rocket visible from the previous.)</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Matthew] You’re really obnoxious and I honestly kind of hate you, but not really? I don’t know, I never told you because I didn’t want you to win the bet, but Pa-- Francis, adopted me sometime after I turned 4 or 5. I don’t… Know what happened to my parents, but I just know they were canadian, and that they’d apparently known Francis beforehand--</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Matthew] Point is; I’ve never really had siblings before and even if you’re literally so annoying- No, really, I don’t even know where to start, you can still be really great, and I </span>
  <em>
    <span>do</span>
  </em>
  <span> really appreciate you.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>(A big, golden curtain of sparks erupts in the sky, and Alfred’s loud whistle of awe interrupts the audio. Matthew laughs too, it sounds a little teary.)</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Matthew] But I don’t think I would’ve ever really felt comfortable with myself like I do now, if you hadn’t forced me outside my shell, so…</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>(Alfred’s figure starts moving towards the camera, and Matthew turns it around to face himself. His glasses are slightly foggy, and something glistens on his cheeks. Tears, maybe, maybe it’s the light. And he sniffs.)</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Matthew] I don’t really know what you and Arthur are so tight-lipped about, but if you need to smash something and yell about it, I know a place or two. And uhm, thank you.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Alfred] Mattie!! Did you get all of that?! Oh my god, the golden one was so AWESOME, I’m definitely getting a </span>
  <em>
    <span>shit-ton</span>
  </em>
  <span> of those for New Years, it’s going to be legendary--</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Alfred] Huh-- Wait, what the hell, are you </span>
  <em>
    <span>crying?!</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>(There’s a hint of a laugh there, and Matthew removes his glasses with one hand, drying his face quickly and shaking his head)</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Matthew] I am </span>
  <em>
    <span>not</span>
  </em>
  <span>, I just got a bunch of soot in my eyes!</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Alfred] Bro, I told you to wear protection glasses, that smoke stuff’s wack as fuck to get in your eyes! You brought this on yourself, man! Help me pack up, we still haven’t eaten that cake francis made, and I am </span>
  <em>
    <span>starving</span>
  </em>
  <span>, Matteh! </span>
  <em>
    <span>Starving!</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>(As Alfred takes the camera, it shows his hair slicked back with a pair of protection goggles sat atop his head, a wide smile forming on his face as he hits the end button. He looks vibrant, nothing particularly new, but for him it’s probably the most vibrant he’s felt in a long time.)</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[[Tape 08 ends]]</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0009"><h2>9. Tape 09</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>[[Tape 09 Label: July 4th 1987 - [Leaving]]</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Alfred] Mattie?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>(The camera is focused on a dark room, sat statically on a table or a windowsill, overlooking Alfred’s and Matthew’s shared bedroom. The door is open, and a golden cone of light falls into the room, Alfred shaking Matthew’s sleeping figure. There’s a grunt, followed by shuffling.)</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Alfred] Come on, Mattie, I need you to help cover for me.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Matthew] hmm- C’ver f’r wh’t?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Alfred] I’m leaving.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Matthew] hmmm?.... Leaving for what?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>(There’s more rustling, before Matthew turns himself over, facing Alfred sitting fully clothed beside his bed. Matthew sits up after a moment, and stares, blanket falling into his lap.)</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Matthew] </span>
  <em>
    <span>Now?</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>(There’s a resolute nod from Alfred. His face set strangely serious, determined, and it shows. Matthew keeps his eyes on him, and Alfred stays still by his side.)</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Matthew] Alfred, are you </span>
  <em>
    <span>sure</span>
  </em>
  <span> about this?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Alfred] It doesn’t matter, I refuse to stay here. Gilbert and Antonio are parked at the station, so I’ll get to the airport just fine.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Matthew] I…</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>(Another pause, Matthew’s voice getting caught in his throat when he tries to speak. Slowly, he slings his legs over the edge, but keeps his eyes on Alfred. Even as he rises to his feet, even as his face shifts into a reassuring smile, eyebrows firmly set and a fighting spirit unlike anything Matthew’s ever seen up close. He’s glowing, and he’s not going to listen if Matthew as much as tries to talk him into staying.)</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>[Matthew] What am </span>
  <em>
    <span>I</span>
  </em>
  <span> supposed to do when you leave? you’re the one who’s gotten me this far, how do you expect me to get by without you pushing me everyday?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Alfred] Dude, you’ll be fine on your own, and this might be good for you! You’re completely invisible all the time, you need to fill up more space, you said so yourself; I’m annoying because I “overshadow” you, right? So, fill up more space, there’ll be plenty of space after I’m gone.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Matthew] That’s not what I meant, and you know it-</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Alfred] I </span>
  <em>
    <span>know</span>
  </em>
  <span> what you mean, and I get it, okay? But you also have to get that I </span>
  <em>
    <span>need this</span>
  </em>
  <span>. I hate being stuck here with </span>
  <em>
    <span>him</span>
  </em>
  <span>, not to mention, I won’t ever achieve that Hollywood-dream if I stay here, I </span>
  <em>
    <span>need to leave</span>
  </em>
  <span>.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>(Matthew stands, standing at the exact same height as Alfred with a set expression on his face. He says nothing, and despite Alfred knowing he understands, he doubts he’s willing to go along with it without a fight.) </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Alfred] Look, if you’re so upset, why don’t you just come with? I can cover the ticket for you, and apartments are cheaper if we split it, we could make that movie.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Matthew] Do you even </span>
  <em>
    <span>know</span>
  </em>
  <span> how hard it is to get by from scratch in America? Not to mention, in </span>
  <em>
    <span>New York</span>
  </em>
  <span>?? What if you run out of money before you get a job? Then what, you’ll be homeless, and </span>
  <em>
    <span>that is hard to get out of--</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Alfred] </span>
  <em>
    <span>But if you came with, we’d have double the chance of making it.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>(Matthew bites his lip, looking at the ground with his arms coming to cross across his chest. He looks to be thinking.)</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Matthew] … I can’t go… Right now.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Alfred] Well, it’s </span>
  <em>
    <span>right now</span>
  </em>
  <span> that I’m leaving, and I don’t have much time before that old geezer wakes up, so you have to make a decision </span>
  <em>
    <span>now</span>
  </em>
  <span>.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Matthew] What is it with you and Arthur anyway, that made you want to </span>
  <em>
    <span>literally leave the country</span>
  </em>
  <span> to get </span>
  <em>
    <span>away</span>
  </em>
  <span> from him? You never told me, and if you leave I won’t ever know, so </span>
  <em>
    <span>at least tell me that.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Alfred] Do you think i have </span>
  <em>
    <span>time</span>
  </em>
  <span> for that right now?!</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>(There’s the faint sound of a door opening in the hall, followed by a quiet call of Alfred’s name. Both of them freezes, silent panic billowing up until Alfred is practically jumping over his bed and grabbing his duffel bag and swinging it over his shoulder, just in time for Arthur to show up in the doorway. Matthew stares between them, Alfred freezing in place half way to the door.)</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Arthur] What the hell is going on here?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Matthew] I--</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[Alfred] Once you pull yourself together to come join me, I’ll tell you the whole thing, Mattie. Until then, you’re just gonna have to cope.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>(Alfred approaches Arthur and pushes past him, leaving the camera running on the windowsill. There’s a stunned silence for a few seconds; Seconds that seem to drag on for years, as Matthew stands half-naked in the middle of the room, staring at the open doorway - It’s only when the shouting starts, that he sits onto the edge of his bed, Alfred’s voice more stern and powerful than Matthew’s used to, and Arthur’s at-first equally as strong tone slowly dwindling into what he’d later refuse to acknowledge as desperate and pleading. Eventually, it all ends with a door slamming, Arthur cut-off mid-sentence as a stunned silence fills the apartment. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>If Francis had anything at heart, he didn’t voice it. Instead, Matthew would discover, he’d sat down in front of him on Al’s bed and silently kept him company as his first and only brother was on his way to a new life; Effectively leaving Matthew behind.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Matthew turns the tape off when Francis has left.)</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>[[End tape 09]]</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
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